Happiness Is An Inside Job

Knowing how to keep score before you play a game is essential.

Too many people focus on external factors when their spotlight should be within.

It’s futile to declare victory if the goal line keeps changing.

Letting others define your happiness is an unmistakable path to a stalemate or worse.

Counting the things that are easily measured makes keeping the score accessible but not accurate.

Krista Tippett points this out in her engaging book Becoming Wise.

The average C.E.O. compensation has exploded in contrast to their employees since about 1980.

Tippet gives some clues regarding this phenomenon.

A report had just come out that the average C.E.O. of a publicly traded company got $10 million in salary a year, and they were going for $11 million. I must ask them, are you not getting by on $10 million when you need 11 million? I don’t get it. And this one guy said just like this-“Oh no, that’s not it. It’s not about the money.” He said, “It’s that we’re very competitive and we want to win. Money happens to be the current measure of winning.

Score-Keeping 101 has no shortage of potential students.

If this is one’s method of declaring victory, the wait for reporting it will be infinite.

Determining triumph by accumulating stuff is missing the point and losing the game.

The old saying, You only live once, but if you do it right, that’s enough never was more accurate.

It’s hard to be self-aware when you are perpetually grasping for what you don’t have and clinging to what you do.

Dopamine isn’t known for its shelf-life.

Elizabeth Muldowney points out: Truth be told, you never can have enough stuff, as you need to keep getting more when seeking this type of satisfaction. Here, in self-actualization, you will realize stuff is not what fulfillment is made of, and you realize, often later than you should have, that you had enough stuff a long time ago.

Happiness and knowing when you have enough isn’t a math equation.

This formula is a dagger straight through the heart of fulfillment. If I get ___, I’ll be happy.

Sahil Bloom explains:

It’s easy to convince yourself that your happiness is contingent upon some external milestone.

But these “if-then” traps are a dangerous mirage.

You climb to the top of the mountain, only to see the happiness you thought you’d find melt away and reappear in the distance.

If you convince yourself that your satisfaction is contingent upon the next achievement or milestone, you’ll never find it.

Real satisfaction and happiness is an inside job.

Find it on the journey. You won’t find it at all.

Like their millionaire bosses, Employees are guilty of keeping the wrong score.

Keep all of this in mind when planning for the second stage of life. You may already have more than you’ll need.

Make sure you apply your internal calculator to the fulfillment equation.

Don’t let outside forces determine your future.

Listen to your inner voice and enjoy the process.

It’s hard to reach the finish line running on a hedonic treadmill.

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